While I was in Udiapur the first time, I was here for an artist residency. I made posts about that experience and shows how the work progressed while I was there. Now that I am back I am working on several projects. I thought I would be nice to share those projects as they progress and get your feedback on the work.
When I arrived back in Udaipur, I knew I wanted to experiment with making work in new ways. As the days passed I also came to realize the difficulty of the transition I was going through. Not only was I having to adjust to Udaipur in a new way, my identity was being reshaped in small and large ways. Since I was coming to a town I had already spent time in and have friends in, I thought it would be much easier. Furthermore, when moving forward we always want to think as if the ‘grass is greener on the other side’. It’s not. In some ways life is more difficult here, not because it is India, but because of my personal situation.
One day I made a photograph in my room. I put myself in the photograph as a ghosted image (the photograph above). As the project continued to evolve I changed the lighting and decided to wear the same dress in every photograph. Several photographs I had to re-shoot a few times because the light was not right. I also took photographs whose composition or general feeling I did not like.
While I was making these photographs I was also keeping a journal of all my feelings related to the experience. The journal entries are full of pain, basically no silver lining. However, I decided I should not try to force my feeling to be something they were not. I just continued to roll with the experience but deciding I was in it for the long haul. I am not ready to share any of my journal entries as they are deeply personal and make references to personal transitions in my life. I am not sure it is even necessary to share them. It could make the project too personal. This might lead to a disconnect for viewers. So, it is something for continued consideration.
If you have read other blog posts, you may realize I read a lot. With this project I wanted it to be expressed with a single word that had multiple meanings through which the images could be translated. It might seem an obvious word, the project is called Transparent.
The definitions of Transparent are:
4. easily seen through, recognized, or detected: transparent excuses.
5. manifest; obvious: a story with a transparent plot.
6. open; frank; candid: the man’s transparent earnestness.
Please feel free to leave a critique. Also, can someone let me know if the photographs look dark on your screen. On my computer they do not look dark when I have them open in Photoshop, but now that they are uploaded they look darker. Thanks!